Tuesday, October 26, 2010


Bored while breastfeeding? Worry no more. Just read my list of handy anti-boredom activities and you’ll make it to the World Health Organisation’s recommendation of 24 months of breastfeeding no troubles at all.
1.              Itemise and file your deductable receipts month by month so that come tax time you don’t want to stab yourself in the eyeball with your felt tip pen. (This is a current anguish I am experiencing).
2.              Sing the entire score of every Rodgers and Hammerstein musical to your baby, paying careful attention to the accent of the King in The King And I.
3.              Read the stack of Spectrum and Sunday Life magazines you’ve been saving since March this year and finally get up to date on now out of date books and movies.
4.              Watch The Breakfast Club and Twenty One Jump Street and reminisce about how you were glued to them while you were meant to be studying for your final school exams.
5.              Stare at the gorgeous creature you created and marvel at yours’ and your partner’s clever-ness.
6.              Type – one handed - the novel you were meant to write while you were growing your little human, but somehow ran out of time.
7.              Do your pelvic floor exercises because the midwives have scared you into thinking that if you don’t, your going to be walking around one day and your uterus will just fall right out of you.
8.              Watch late-night infomercials. Truly people, they can be fascinating. I’ve been known to unwind from a show by sitting in front of the tv and watching people sell jewelry, unable to go to bed until I get to see their face.
9.              Write a list of jobs your partner could do to help you out. For example, putting on a load of washing doesn’t count. Hanging it out, however, is how you earn brownie points.
10.           See how many m and m’s you can consume in one breastfeed. You can come up with compulsory colour patterns to really add to the challenge if you like.


  1. You'll be a great, funny breastfeeding mummy. Can I just add my favourite one - learn to breastfeed lying down and sleep while you are feeding.

  2. have considered that, so long as i don't role onto it! - saw a woman at the post office - her baby was in those baby sacks and sucking away while she wrapped parcels. hands free seems to be the way to go! thanks for reading

  3. Hey, I've tried your suggestions, here are the results:
    1) Absolutely no time to look through all those drawers where the stupid receipts are hidden - not very likely tax return will get done this year anyway.
    2)Doable, but chances are the baby will stop feeding and start crying...
    3) Doable, as long as you keep the whole stack within reach
    4) and 5) Yes, absolutely working, also at same time
    6) Boy, it's either gonna be a very bad or very short novel. Poor bastard who's gotta proofread the thing...
    7-10) Doable, I've become quite the expert at No. 9!

    My survival strategy: Have everything you need (Glass of water, M&Ms, remote controls, phones, newspaper, hankies) arranged within reach on the couch and then decide on a DVD series with many seasons.
    And no, you won't roll onto your baby.

  4. christine ha! in a few short weeks we can swap early johnny depp crushes!!! maybe i need a motorised chair so i can motor around the house picking up all the things i forgot to put near me before i sat down!

  5. Or become adept at moving around collecting that stuff while the baby is still latched on !!! Yeah! - have tried that once or twice.

  6. During those early days I caught up with everything on my DVR plus read all those baby books I had stacked up. When she got older, no chance. Completely different. Even the lying down nursing part changes. Too much kicking and rolling around. Not much sleeping going on. Though I am often grateful not to have to hold my head up, because I haven't slept a full night in over a year. Ugh. But you don't have to worry about that right now. Your hormones will protect you for a few months!!!!


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