Monday, September 12, 2011

EXTRAMARITAL AFFAIRS AND BEING PLUMBED BY THE PLUMBER


‘You could definitely have an affair and get away with it,’ says one of my male friends recently. ‘Some bloke could come over to fix the plumbing so to speak, you invite him in and bam. Before you know it, your marriage vows lie broken at the bottom of your bed.’

This discussion occurred during a weekend away with two other couples both with children the same age as Miss Q.

It took place after the ‘do you want another one’ convo and led nicely into the ‘decrease in sex’ talk.

This may seem an odd blog to post after celebrating my anniversary yesterday but I have just returned home from a walk with a single friend, to discover a man fixing my plumbing.
Seriously, he was fitting a new pipe in the front lawn.

My first thought was that he was relatively good looking and it was a shame my friend hadn’t walked back to my place and accidentally met him.
And then, because I was brought up to be polite and it is quite a warm day and he is digging a hole wearing a flannie and long pants I asked him if he needed a glass of water.
Immediately he stopped his work and looked me dead in the eye as if to assess where I was coming from.
I would have thought the child at my feet, chattering away while she practiced her stair climbing was evidence enough of my innocent intent, but perhaps not.

Perhaps he does indeed fix women’s plumbing, one lonely housewife at a time.

And so, after he had declined my charitable offer (should I read into that do you think?) and Q had finished climbing the stairs, I sat down to research if extramarital affairs are in fact common practice.

It would appear so.

Someone is having an affair in nearly 80% of marriages this article reckons.

Eighty percent!

That’s a lot of plumbers!

And what on earth are all these Stay At Home Mums doing with their kids while they’re being plumbed by the plumber?

More investigation is required…
Kidding folks, I’m kidding.

3 comments:

  1. opps- I actually need to call a plumber. Maybe that's why when you call they are always busy & running late!

    ReplyDelete
  2. HA HA HA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! just don't let matthew read this blog before you do!

    ReplyDelete
  3. perhaps we could add plasterers to the list......I had a plasterer fix my bathroom wall recently after my kids pulled the towel rail OUT OF THE WALL grrrr. Seemed like a perfectly nice normal guy. I did answer the door in my dressing gown as I was just running down the stairs after my shower when he rang the door and I didn't want the kids to open it. A few weeks later, hubby and I were having a night out at our local pub and we ran into the plasterer guy while we were there. Could not get rid of the guy, and as we were leaving he said to me 'don't get offended but would you be interested in a threesome?' WTF????? On the whole, I think the male partner in a relationship is more likely to stray than a SAHM. More opportunities through work, etc.

    ReplyDelete

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...