MAN COLD, BACK PAIN…WHAT’S NEXT…PMS????

Last week Gregory had a man cold. A strain worse than the most dastardly case of swine flu.

Yesterday he hurt his back at work and compared the pain to childbirth.

You can imagine the sympathy he is receiving.

Of course this happened at 9.35am just as I was rushing out the door to my writing workshop, the writing workshop I’d been looking forward to all week.

To go or not to go that was the question…for about three seconds before the brother that was Q-sitting for the day (bless his little cotton socks) told me to ‘get out of here’; he’d take care of Miss Q and the embattled Gregory.

And take care he did.

Meeting Gregory around the corner at his work, escorting the crippled chef home, helping him up the stairs, rubbing in the deep heat, lowering him to the floor, helping him up from the floor when he needed to go to the bathroom and holding a bucket for Gregory to wee in because he couldn’t make it to the bathroom.

I will concede this means he must have been in some considerable pain because our apartment is so small it’s only about four steps between each room, of which there are only three in total anyway.

Then of course ‘the guilts’ set in.

There I was at my writing workshop. Indulging my dream to become a writer while my brother takes care not just of my child, but of my husband as well.

For free.

Great way to spend a Sunday.

But then I remembered the membership I have. The club I’ve belonged to for thirty-two years.

Membership was entirely by chance of course, but it lasts a lifetime and it is (we all hope) impossible to get kicked out of.

There are just a few stipulations that need to be mentioned:

·               A member is required to be on hand for other members whenever necessary (except of you’re overseas and then your only requirements are phone calls, emails and long-distance sympathy).

·               Everything is done for free. There are no I-owe-you’s and you can’t keep a tally of your contributions

·               Forgetting birthdays is not cool. You don’t have to get a present but you do have to remember a phone call and a singing telegram

·               Long term loyalty is expected to the point of not ever being addressed

·               One person’s business is considered everybody else’s. Opinions are offered even when they’re not wanted and are expected to be heard and discussed

·               Every member is always right, even when they’re not, which is why we have the above rule

·               Senses of humour are mandatory. As is coping with a bit of well-intentioned ribbing

·               New recruits are welcomed with wide smiles and open hearts…so long as they don’t mind following the above stipulations

God bless my family.